DUNCE WHISKEY TETRACTYS
Using our divine distillation process, we’ve crafted a spirit of the utmost quality and taste. Our process mirrors the Pythagoras Theorem, because as history tells us, the triangle shape is the most powerful tool for imbuing knowledge and enlightenment.
DUNCE WHISKEY CREATION PROCESS
To ensure perfect harmony from source to sip, we strategically blend our ingredients in tandem with astrological calendars, following the teachings of Pythagoras and various druids. As suggested by leading experts, we initiate the fermentation process during the triple solar alignment of the equinox to increase the flow of energy.
We then strain the solution through a conical device, as these shapes possess purifying properties according to Pyramid Power.
As Dunce Whiskey begins its aging process, our master distillers place Dunce caps on each barrel to conically charge the liquid with even more divinity. Dunce is crafted in Tamworth, New Hampshire—at Tamworth Distilling & Mercantile – where the distillery layout and barrel placement is optimized to follow the Golden Ratio.
After aging, we properly dilute Dunce Whiskey with pure waters and funnel the liquid into bottles of optical perfection and clarity.
As the batch is finalized, our distillers proudly gather around the bottled whiskey and recite its ritualistic oath to imbue one final touch of enlightenment for good measure.
CONICAL ENERGY: EXPLAINED
Historians and scientists have uncovered that pyramids possess electromagnetic energy capabilities. Pyramids were built with frequency-selective materials in their walls, like quartz, that generate additional energy through vibrations.
Energy enters the top of a pyramid, reflecting off its walls downward due to the force of the pyramid’s central spin field. As energy accumulates, it travels from the north of the magnetic field, interacting with electrons emitted from the pyramid’s axis. This energy eventually moves to the pyramid’s base, where it disperses.
In the High Middle Ages, philosopher John Duns popularized the theory that pyramid shapes and cones possessed divine power.
Duns’ beliefs are also integral to Wiccan culture, which spiritually link the cone to that of the chakras, which are believed to maintain the flow of energy in one’s body. The root chakra (at the base of the spine) coincides with the bottom of the cone, which rises to the crown chakra at the top of the head.
Historically, people would join together in the pyramids, believing their seven chakras would be re-centered when combined with the pyramids’ existing energies.
THE WORLD'S MOST INTELLIGENT WHISKEY
Aiming to take a playful jab at the uninspired and often false stories behind “sourced” whiskey brands, Dunce Whiskey originated as a conceptual joke.
However, after further research into the history of the dunce cap, a maze of ancient scientific theories was uncovered— yielding a product enriched with classic flavor and an undeniably clever point of view.
Dunce is a column-distilled, high rye whiskey sourced from MGP with a medium body, a grassy undertone and notes of sweet cream vanilla. Aged four years in No. 3 new char oak barrels, Dunce is a scholarly blend of spice, fruit, and honeyed aroma.
Open your mind to Dunce Whiskey.